The Heroic Tale of Nancy

Chapter 1: Everything is Meaningless Without Nancy

We begin our adventure together, guarding a group of traveling merchants. (Wait…whatever happened to those merchants? Weren’t we supposed to be guarding them?!)

A nearby city is covered in rising smoke, and a dragon flies in the sky over it. Our party argues about checking out the commotion, since the dragon looks scary. We eventually decide to sneak over to investigate.

Along the way, a group of strangely garbed people are attacking a lone woman. Our party again debates the merits of getting involved. Who knows if the woman is a good person? Brambo strongly suggests the attackers are unlikely to be good people. The party agrees to attack. Our first battle! We are all amazing. We kill the attackers (except one we keep to interrogate) and save the woman.

The woman lies bleeding on the ground. Bruce approaches her. “Are you important?” he asks. The woman doesn’t answer. She seems unimportant. That’s okay. Muffin heals her anyways. Then we turn to the interrogate the attacker. Except we realize we don’t know how. We make a few unsuccessful attempts to question him. Then Magdare hits him until he goes unconscious, steals his clothes, and leaves him tied up. That’s okay too. I’m sure we’ll get better at interrogations later!

We continue on toward the city, the grateful woman joining our party. The poor city is in chaos, with large groups of raiders looting houses and killing villagers. Through the commotion, Magdare looks for herbs everywhere. There are no herbs. Instead, we find a group of raiders. We hide in a clump of nearby bushes and discuss our next step. After a heated discussion we come to an agreement. We‘ll intimidate them.

In unison, all six members of our party stand slowly from behind the bushes. The raiders stare. We glower at them. “What are you guys doing…here…?” we ask. The raiders look confused. “What were you doing behind the bushes?” they reply. Valid point. We continue to stare at each other. Our plan isn’t working. We try harder to look frightening. The only one to succeed is the gnome, Chihuahua. Our plan is in shambles. Oh well. We kill them. (But again leave one alive for interrogation). This time our questioning skills improve! We find out they’re cultists searching for riches. And they have several leaders, one named Mondath and the other one named Cyanwrath.

We proudly continue our way through the city, eventually reaching a large keep. We fight our way into the keep and the city guards shut the gates behind us. Inside are many terrified villagers hiding. The woman we rescued reunites with her family and leaves our party. We are unable to convince her to abandon her family and continue fighting for us.

The guards direct us to a room where their leader, Governor Nighthill, is staying. We burst into the room. The Governor stands in the center, discussing something with the Castellan. They stare. We stare. We realize we should say something. Nobody in our party can think of anything to say. The silence grows awkward. Brambo decides to speak. “How…how are you doing?” he asks. “Yes. How’s it going?” Bruce continues. The Governor looks at us like we’re idiots. “Very badly,” he replies. Magdare jumps in, informing the Governor that we obtained critical information after interrogating several cultists. We discovered they had two leaders: “Mandick” and “Cyan rat”. The names seem slightly off? But it doesn’t matter. The Governor looks grateful. Yaay!

The Governor wisely decides to trust us. He gives us our first quest: to save the city’s burning mill. We leave the keep through an old tunnel in back. Muffin casts “Speak with Animals” on her pet mouse, and it warns of strange noises. The warning is useless. The party continues on.

A swarm of rats suddenly attacks. Tragically, no one in the party has oil or fire to attack with. Everyone is almost killed. Somehow, however, the party manages to take them down. We swear to buy oil in the future.



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